Wednesday, October 28, 2009
If I said I'm fine, I would be lying. If I said everything doesn't matter, it would only be true to a certain extent. If I said I will be able to overcome all these myself, if I said I can do it, actually in reality, all these aren't easy at all. I know no one says that it's going to be easy but it's just too taxing. I'm tired, but I know I've to carry on. I've to pull through, I cannot give up for if I give up, I'll be letting my loved ones down.80% of my heart says retain, but mummy asked me this question that day. She asked, "Are you sure you can make it through next year? If not you will be wasting your time." I asked her back, "Are you sure that I will be able to make it through Poly?" And now, I'm hesitating. I really love SR and I do not want to leave. However, I should also think of my future. What makes me so sure that I will be able to do well next year?Perhaps it's results day tomorrow and I'm worried about it. I know I won't be able to promote or be able to take the re-exam. Retain is the only choice. I said that I'm prepared to be retained and I really meant it but there's just this element that makes me not feel right. I don't know what's that. Fear? Anxious?I need a shoulder or perhaps a hug now? I don't even know what I need.This just sucks. ):
signing off with passion @ {10/28/2009 08:17:00 PM}
